Many people think Sundays are the beginning of the week, but for most of us we think of the beginning of the week as Monday. Monday is the day we go back to work or school. So we dread Mondays. For some reason today, I began thinking of today as anything is possible day.
I started thinking of the series Girls which is sadly ending shortly. I’ve come to think of the main character, Hannah, as my gateway into the minds of young women today. So many possibilities and choices, it becomes very hard to choose. But I can see some of myself in every character. I can see my fragility in Shoshana. I can see my selfishness in both Jessie and Marnie. Jessie is beautiful and passionate and dramatic, and Marnie just creates alot of drama, so of course I’d wish to be more like Jessie. I can see myself in Hannah’s mom Loreen, having to begin life again in upward middle age, and thinking I’d be alone forever, and sex was a thing of the past, the fear of starting over alone. But I think most of us are the most like Hannah, doing the best we can, and still making a mess of things.
I was going to go to yoga this morning, but I had 15 minutes, so I decided to try to throw a lovely porcelain vase on the wheel. Ok, I had closer to 30 minutes, and then something happened as I was trying to throw this pot. I thought to myself, what if this pot today is my yoga? Can’t yoga really be just anything we concentrate on 100% and put our best effort into? So I started trying to throw a pot made from really well wedged porcelain clay. I always tell beginners to do what I never do. I say “the quality of what you throw is based on how well you prepare your clay before you throw it”, but I rarely do what I tell them. No, I force that clay. I use all my strength and leverage to force that clay into the shape I want it to go to. I get done with a reasonably acceptable piece, that looks to the novice like I know what I’m doing, but I know and other experts would know as soon as they picked it up that it’s far to heavy for me to know what I’m doing. And isn’t this the way we live alot of our lives? Trying to force things into the shapes we want them, using all our might? Recently, even though I’ve been doing clay as a hobby for 15 years, I’ve begun calling myself an amateur. When I first started, I used to try to be the best and worried about impressing everyone around me with what I was doing. I think I finally have it right. I’m a beginner. We’re all really just beginners. We’re all really just beginners at navigating this thing called life, and each day we’re starting over again.
So why I love Mondays? Everything is beginning again. What if we just said to ourselves, I’m just a beginner so it’s ok to say when I don’t know something. It’s ok to ask for help. It’s ok to ask for forgiveness. It’s ok for me to ask you to show me the way to do something, or even just to show me the way you do something that is different than the way I go at it. Maybe today I’ll just play with saying “yes” to everything like Shonda Rhimes. Maybe today I’ll just play with saying “no” to everything, just to see what that feels like. That’s living life like you’re doing yoga, being in the moment. Then Mondays can be wonderful; you just have to give yourself permission.