Building your self esteem; part one

As we near the end of the calendar year,  we artificially choose this time as an opportunity to take stock of our lives and our progress towards our goals.  If you are one of those people who does this, this article might be for you.

How do we become people who like ourselves if we hate everything about ourselves?  How do we go from being someone who is always self critical to becoming our best friend?  It is very easy to dislike ourself when we constantly compare ourselves to others.  That’s the first mistake you’re making if you’re doing this. Stop.  Start by comparing yourself to you.  It becomes a choice in our thinking to keep doing the same thing you’ve been doing for another day, or make this the day to do something different.  How about starting today, right now, doing  one or two of these mental exercises first thing in the morning?

  1. Your appearance- so you hate your _______.  Ok, we don’t need to hear about what you hate about your appearance.  Today, find one thing you like about yourself.  Maybe it’s your feet, maybe it’s your hair, your nails, your skin.  It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks but it does matter that you find somethings you like about yourself and acknowledge them.    Can you think about this characteristic and let yourself feel proud of it?
  2. Your qualities- often easier to name qualities you have that you know are good.   Can you make a list of those good qualities?  Don’t diminish them because being loving and trusting got your hurt.  Just acknowledge those good qualities.  Can you take that positive quality and use it to do something nice for someone else?  Even a stranger? Or even for someone you’re not particularly fond of?  You’re a great baker?  Make something for a neighbor.  Bring something into the office.  Enjoy the positive comments you receive.
  3. Quiet the chatter.  The worst thing we do to make ourselves miserable is to obsess about something that upsets us.  How do you quiet your brain?  Do something brand new that you’ve never done before.  It requires your full attention. Do something difficult.  It improves your self esteem because you dared to try it.  Do something you’re afraid of.  The mastery of your fear increases your confidence. Do something silly, laughter is a great healer.   Start a conversation with a stranger, who knows what you will learn.  Strive to learn something, you  have to open your mind to do so.  Shonda Rhimes made this year the year of “Yes” and as a result of doing this, lost over 100 pounds and wrote a book about it; we never know where new avenues can lead us.  Dare to try.
Building your self esteem; part one

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